If Walls Could Talk
by Electric Acid pop
Summary: Have you ever wondered what it would be like if walls talked... Well folks now you will know ... May not finish this story.. Cos losts where plot lines going
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

**Camping out**

In a distance land, where people live free. At least so they think. There are a group men or soldiers (which ever you want it to be). There women and child too. Besides from the fact there are animals and other strange things. That lives in a fairly large country side called Gondor.

At crack of dawn. At place between Rohan and Gondor. There are two wide awake men sitting at a camp fire. Waiting for there wives to wake up. The one man got sick of hanging out at the fire and he was started to grow hungry. So

Faramir said "Hey Aragorn, I am hungry I'm going to look for something to eat okay".

"Okay then Faramir." I will wait here till our wives are wake up" said Aragorn.

So off went Faramir looking for a good meal for him, his wife and friends. Faramir walk on and on and on but he couldn't find any good prey to hunt down. All Faramir saw while he was looking for food was tiny little bird or mice. It was a little sad how there was nothing at all out there to kill. So Faramir went back to find Aragorn and his wife Ewoyn. The First thing Aragorn said to Faramir is Did to kill any thing. So we can eat.

Faramir like " well no but I did see birds and mice's. Does it look like a killed anything."

"Sadly but mostly nothing ate able" said Faramir.

"Well frick" says Aragorn.

"Now what are we going to do" said Aragorn.

"Not really sure right at the moment" says Faramir.

"Well" Aragorn says.

"You need to keep on looking or I will go and look around. You can stay and wait for our wives to wake up" said Aragorn.

"Ummm, I think it's your turn to look around. Maybe you will have better luck then me" said Faramir

So Aragorn went for a stroll in the forest to find something food to eat. Will after a mile into the forest Aragorn finally find a deer. So Aragorn reaches of an arrow to shoot the deer but some idiot stick scared the hell out of the deer. It took off as fast as its leg could carry it. Aragorn was like what? Why? Did that thing have to scare the deer. Now I'm going to have to keep on looking.

"RAWER! Darn animal." say Aragorn.

So he carries on looking again. Aragorn was ready for what came next. To Aragorn surprise there was a huge cat of some kind. He thinks it might be a saber-toothed tiger. But he's not really 100 percent sure. Aragorn wasn't ready for what happen next. The tiger thing pounce on poor Aragorn. Aragorn screams as little ass off in fear.

Faramir shot up and was like what is going on. Then Faramir stood there to listen a bit. Then Fairymir was ooooh noooo. Aragorn's need some help. So then Faramir wake up Ewyon and Arwan. So that he did have to wait for them to wake. If he did wait Aragorn would surely be dead. Then Ewyon and Arwan started panicky. Faramir like calm down please.

"You are not making any easier freaking out for it to be any help to Aragorn." say Faramir

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So Aragorn wrestling with a huge ass tiger thing. He's still not sure what it is yet. Aragorn is having problem getting his sword out. But still screaming at the top of his lungs. Aragorn's like Get off you over size fish.

"Did I say fish?" say Aragorn.

" I meant cat thing." say Aragorn to himself.

Now Aragorn and the Tiger thing are rolling around. They rolled down a huge hill in the giant ass river. Let just say the Tiger flip out on the water. Aragorn was like sweet.

"The cat is afraid of water." say Aragorn to himself

Well that was easy" said Aragorn to himself

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Faramir, Ewoyn and Arwan come fling in the forest. But they couldn't see where Aragorn was.

Arwan was like "WHERE MY HUSBAND."

"Don't ask me. Like really" said Faramir.

So they went to hunt for Aragorn. They found him two mile away from where they entered into the forest. They saw him climbing out of a river.

Arwan go "Oh my god are you okay Aragorn."

"I'm fine." said Aragorn.

"Just a bit on the wet side" said Aragorn sarcastically to Awran.

"Okay" she said to Aragorn.

"Well" said Faramir.

"I don't know what happen to you, but have you at least seen any food at all" said Fairymir.

"Yeah but the dumb cat thing or is it tiger scared it all off "said Aragorn in a sad voice.

"Really?" said Faramir.

"I'm dying of hunger" said Faramir.

"Well Faramir Cup cake, so is everyone else" said Ewyon.

"Like really? Why the pet names Ewyon" said Faramir.

"I don't know. MAYBE BECAUSE I LIKE TO CALL YOU THOSE NAME MUFFIN" said Ewyon.

"Ahahaha" Aragorn was laughing at Faramir.

"Faramir you have pretty nicknames" said Aragorn.

"Oh" said Faramir in an angry voice.

"I think I'm going back to the camp fire" said Faramir as stomp away.

Arwan was like "now you gone and done it Aragorn my sweet heart" With amused voice.

"So who hunting for food" said Ewyon in a hinting to Aragorn.

"I am. Since Faramir took off" said Aragorn.

Arwen was like "you drove him away on your own hun."

"So you get to do it on you own honey bun" said Arwen.

"Must you call me that Arwen" said Aragorn.

"Yes" said Arwen.

"Fine then" said Aragorn.

So off went Aragorn again looking for food that is ate able.

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Back the camp fire was Faramir mumbling over his breath about Aragorn and his beautiful wife. Faramir did not like the pet name. The name annoys him and makes him sound like a little child. Thinking to himself. Arwan and Ewyon finally showed back up at the camp fire. Ewyon was like what are you whining about.

"Nothing" said Faramir.

"Okay but some how I don't believe you" said Ewyon.

Now Faramir was getting pretty bored and hungry sitting alone by fire.

"Well Ewyon and Arwen. i'm gonna go back into the forset and finish looking for something to eat mmmmmmmmkay" said Faramir.

"Don't get to lost now" said Ewyon

"Oh trust me. I won't" said Faramir

So he headed back into the forest to find something to eat. He starts to feel like his hadn't eaten in months. Just as he walks in the forest he sees a yummy looking deer. A good size deer to kill. So he pulls out his bow and arrow. Gets ready to shoot it. Then he lets the arrow go. It flings through the air. Hits the deer and the deer falls to the ground die.

"It about damn time" said Faramir.

So Faramir heads back to the camp fire with his prize. He's feeling pretty proud of his good work and hunting skills. While sitting the fire preparing the food he yells for Aragorn. But Aragorn didn't hear Faramir called. So faramir whatever then. So Faramir was done cooking the meat. So Arwan, Ewyon and Faramir start eating without Aragorn. They were too hungry to wait for Aragorn to get back. They finish eating there food. That Faramir work his ass for it.

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Aragorn never did find a thing after the Saber-tooth Tiger scared of the deer on him. So he went back to the camp fire. To find his wife and his friends. Eat some yummy animal of some sort.

Aragorn was like "WHAT? WHY DIDN'T YOU COME AND FIND ME. WHEN YOU FOUND SOME FOOD."

"Because I was too hungry to look for you" said Faramir.

"Whatever then" said Aragorn pretty mad at Faramir.

But he gets over it pretty fast. Aragorn begins to stuff his face. When Aragorn was done eating he wants to get a move on.

So Aragorn said "To the guy its time to pack your pack your stuff and get a move on."

Their all like okay then. So now there on their way home.

It was a long ride home. The horses are getting pretty annoyed with there rider. Bucky was now tired of the person sitting on him. He rears up and knocks Ewyon to the ground.

Ewyon was like "stupid ass horse."

Who said horses had to like there riders. So bucky took off on Ewyon.

"Faramir can go and catch that stupid horse. I gonna kill it" said Ewyon.

"Please don't" said Faramir

"I will rid him so it won't happen again" said Faramir.

"Fine" said Ewyon.

So Faramir went off looking for the horse but couldn't find him at all.

"Ewyon he gone I don't know where he went" said Faramir.

"Just jump on my horse and we can go home like this then" said Faramir.

"RAWER" said Ewyon yelled in a frustired. Aragorn jump a little in amusement with the horse rearing up on Ewyon.

They rode on the for a days and nights.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**Still on the road**

So the still on there way back from where ever it is that there were (_I know that it might bad that I don't know where they were at lol_). The journey was hard. For fact that Faramir had to share his horse with Eowyn.

One has to wonder where Eowyn horse ran off too. They see it every now and again but it know use. The horse will not stay in one place long enough for someone to get him. To Buckys point a view it's good to get her off his back.

Unforturely Faramir his horse did not want his riders either. He sent them both fly over his head. Cadillac took off like Bucky did. It strange how ones horse has mind of its own and really doesn't in join having some jackass on his back.

Now yelling at the horse doesn't actually the help there problem. It more a less scared the horse more. Then Cadillac turns around to see what he had done to his riders. Let just say the horse was proud of what it had done and went on home without his rider but before he went home he went looking for Bucky. His little bubby. Cadillac found Bucky and they both went together.

"now i really wanna kill that dumb animal said Eowyn.

"No" said Faramir

"Why not" said Eowyn

"Because we are still going to need them someday" said Faramir.

"You know Aragorn your not much help" said Faramir

Sorry says Aragorn

"Now what are we going to do" said Eowyn

"We can still double" said Arwan

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While they were talking about there little problem. A rider comes back with there horses. Minds you that the rider had some problems with the horses. Because they really didn't want to have those annoying people on there backs. Tho they no chose in the matter. The Rider is being the horses back to Faramir and Eowyn. The rider was talking to the horse and said you have know damn chose but to let your riders rid you home. So they can go home too. When the rider got to where Arwan, Eowyn, Aragorn and Faramir was. He gave them back there mad little horses.

"Thank you very much" staid Faramir

"Your welcome" said the rider

Faramir getting little curious. To know who this person and what his name might be. Mind you that Aragorn think the same thing as Faramir

"What is your name" ask Faramir

"I am Locksley the son of Ardeth" said the rider

"Where do you hail" said Aragorn

"Lamedon of Gondor" said Locksley

"Oh" said everyone that was there

"But now I must be off" said Locksley

"Where are you off too" said Arwen

"Not really sure at the moment" said Locksley

"But what did you father (Ardeth) for a living" said Aragorn a little bit curious at this point

"His was a soldier of Gondor at the ring war" said Locksley. But he dies at the Battle of the Pelennor fields.

"Oh" said Aragorn." I did not know" said Aragorn

"That's okay; I did not tell you right way" said Locksley

"You should come back to Mina Tirith with us" said Aragorn.

"So I can talk to you more" said Aragorn

"I guess I can come with you guy" said Locksley.

Not knowing that outcome of this. He is a little freaked out. He's thinking that he might be in trouble for some weird reason. if he doesn't go he will never know until he gets to Minas Tirith.

So they rode off. They are like three days away from Minas Tirith. They rode on for what seem forever. Yet it seem like they were moving at a fast pace. They are all getting pretty tired and its was dark out.

So they all set up camp for the night. They take the saddles off the horse for the night. Because notice how unhappy there horses were. Not that they don't take off the saddle when they set up camp few nights ago.

They cook some leftover deer to eat (_it was couple h_our _that it was cut and wrap in spare clothes. Plus being in the heat for hours on end)._ Not very yummy meat may I add. But you can't complain about it. Food is food live with it.

After they were done eating the went to bed but there was one person gonna be doing look out for like the whole night. Which it was Awren did not mind at all. She actually enjoyed it.

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The next morning they set off again on road. Arwen is getting a little annoyed with this and really wish she was home all ready. They travel in silence for hours on end. Until Locksley broke the silence with a question.

"So what brings a king so far out of his castle?" Said Locksley

"Well I wanted so see some friends that live in Rohan" said Aragorn

"Oh, like who did you go and see. If you don't mind me asking" said Locksley

"The King of Rohan! Which is Eowyn brother" said Aragorn

"Oh! Which is Eowyn" said Locksley

'Oops! We forgot to tell you who we all are" said Aragorn

"Well I you who you are and Faramir but I don't know the ladies are" said Locksley

"Arwan is the elf which is my wife" said Aragorn

"Eowyn is Faramir wife" said Aragorn

"Oh I get it now" said Locksley

"Umm yeah" said Aragorn

Then it all went quite again. They are almost at Minas Tirith. So they rode on and on and on hour on hours. They had to set up camp again. They took off the saddle for the horses. So that they were comfort. Had something to eat and then went to sleep. It was Locksley turn to be look out.

It was to late to make it back to Minas Tirith that night. They figure about 5 hour rode back to Minas Tirith today. They are starting to miss the comfort beds that had a the castle. Or at least Arwen and Eowyn were anyways.

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The next morning they were up in hurry. Because are tired of the hard ground. Or at least Locksley wasn't he didn't not mind it at all. They all miss were miss the nice soft comfortly beds back at the caslte. So quickly saddle up the horse.

So the keep on rode after while they stop for food (_Not that they did before all the other times before. I keep forgetting to state that the have stop for food and water). _Well after just sitting there for awhile. They decided it was time to make a move on.

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All the people that love there king and there stewart. Started to cheering when they saw their king and his stewart make to gate of Minas Tirith. Mind you Locksley wasn't all that excited to see Minas Tirith. They went to their corridors to put away their clothes and other things they brought back.

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More interesting fact on Lockley will be stated next chapter. Which will be up with in the next week.

Sorry the late post and updates


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